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. frustrated, to say the least. She is really attracted to multiple men, many of whom are also part of the parish, but she will never have the courage to act on it. As a result, I hear her weekly confession about one man after another who she "lusts after in her heart" and an increasing number of "Hail Marys" and "Our Fathers" seems to be enough to keep her from adultery. I guess in many ways I have done my job and kept her from actually sinning.I know, I know, thinking about it is the same as doing it according to all my training, but I cannot completely agree with it, not now after all that has been happening the past decade. Yes, I am not afraid to talk about the pedophile crimes committed by too many of my brethren. I know while I might have been guilty of sometimes thinking sexually about a few of my parishioners, I have never had such a thought about a child! I also know in my heart of hearts I would have taken action if I realized any of my co-priests were guilty of such. Ben looked at me for an instant then continued giving Annie instructions, "Lacie and I need to talk, so I want you to take morning stables today, Annie. As to the schooling, tell the lads to do the same thing as yesterday if Lacie and I don't finish what we are doing here."Annie nodded, and grinned. She hugged her Grandfather, and me, then ran out the door. It was obvious that she was happy to be back home. I was surprised, because I didn't know she was coming home this weekend. It would be nice to have her, someone my own age, to talk to. Though I loved Jean a whole bunch, her sensibilities were of a different era, and we just didn't mesh.Ben woke me from my daydreaming."Lacie? Lacie, come and sit down. We need to talk." That we do, Ben, that we do," I said as I went to the big wing chair next to the fireplace and sat down."Must you sit so far away, Lacie?" For the moment, Ben, just be satisfied that I'm still here." Lacie!" No, Ben, I told you all about what my family did to me ....
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